How We Heard The News About Our Second Child - Part One

When we found out about Flora Lin becoming our daughter, we were floating on happiness!  We made the rounds of telling friends and family the rest of the day, and collapsed into bed late that night.  What a happy, happy day!
But something, even in all of my joy, was gnawing at me.  It wouldn't stop.  I couldn't wait.  Feeling a little sheepish, I began searching on my phone.  Searching the lists from agency after agency that might contain the photo or description of my second daughter.  I knew she was out there and I knew we didn't have much time to find her (less than two months).  My heart was urging me on, but I hadn't even known about my sweet Flora Lin for 24 hours!!!!  I felt guilty, so I didn't even tell Sam what I was doing.
The next morning I expressed to Sam how happy I was to be matched to our daughter, but that I felt a strong urgency to find our other one.  He laughed and said he wouldn't be surprised if I had already started searching - I confessed and was thankful that he knew (and understood) me so well!
That same day, on my lunch break at work, I called our family coordinator at our agency (that urgency of finding her wouldn't go away).  I calmly thanked her for matching us with Flora Lin but wanted to EMPHASIZE TO HER THAT MY OTHER DAUGHTER WAS OUT THERE AND I MUST FIND HER NOW NOW NOW - DO YOU HEAR ME?!!  NOW!!!!  Actually, though I was saying that on the inside, it came out very politely and controlled.  I told her if even one child MIGHT be a match, but she wasn't sure to PLEASE let us make that decision.  Once I made my sentiments clear (y'all, I was so calm and polite I couldn't believe it was me on the phone!), our sweet coordinator explained how getting matched with a second child worked and where to look and where not to look for her.  She also thanked me (I tell you, she knew just how to handle my inner "momma bear"!) for letting her know that we were willing to consider things that might be slightly outside our original parameters and that we were VERY serious in seeking our second child.  So, again, we waited and I searched.  It was March 20th.  We had until May 11th to be matched with a second.  The days went by, but with much more happiness in sharing the news of Flora Lin, and just because I finally knew her!
On April 4th, Sam left to go on a work trip (which happens quite often) to Georgia.  I went to my job, expecting a busy day ahead.  About 11:15 (which was my busiest time of the day), Sam called me.  I really don't remember much of what he said except "agency," "e mail," "side of the road," "barbeque sandwich," and "MIGHT BE A MATCH YOU NEED TO CALL THEM." 
I think perhaps he mentioned some other things about her, but the world around me was spinning and I didn't know whether to shout, cry, smile, worry, faint or hug the nearest person!  I do remember him telling me something about her heart, and that's when I knew.  I knew like people will say, I just knew it was meant to be or I just knew that was what was going to happen.  I knew it was Charlotte Nicole.  I just knew.  I knew her name.  I knew there would be something to do with the color pink.  I just knew she would be a heart baby.  I scribbled some notes on paper and called the agency.  I don't remember where I called them, I was so stunned.  And, unlike Flora Lin's Match Day, I couldn't be with Sam to do this together.  He was on the side of the road with a barbeque sandwich (there's a country song waiting to come out).  I was at the front counter trying to pretend I could run a cash register and answer the phone correctly while I was wanting to find out about my daughter.  Sam had also said some words that sounded like "careful," "objective," and "let's not rush into anything, ok, Michelle?!" but you have to remember that I was on top of the world and you don't always remember things word for word when you're floating on happiness.  Or eating a barbeque sandwich.
I called our family coordinator.  She told me about Charlotte.  About her heart defect and when she had surgery and what medications she might be on.  And then she told me that she was about two months older than Flora Lin.  I had to swallow hard with that one.  Two two-year olds?!
Having two children the same age but unrelated biologically is called "twinning" or "artificial twinning" in the adoption world.  Sam and I had read a little bit about twinning (there's hardly any new information out there) and decided we would never, ever, ever, EVER, EVER consider twinning.  EVER.  It wasn't worth the potential sibling rivalry.  So you know exactly what I said next.

"When can I see her file?!"

God has a way of teaching you about the never, evers, doesn't He?   :)

And then I heard something I didn't expect.

We can't release her file to you until you do some research and get the ok from your social worker. Her special need is not on your list of things you said that you are willing to accept.

?!

If you know me well, you know that I don't back down easy when I'm after something.  So, I called my ever-traveling, side-of-the-road-calling,  barbeque-eating-husband-that-I-love-very-much back and updated him on where we were and what our plan was.  Research mode.  I quickly got to work, asking the pharmacist at the store to give me any information she could about the medications mentioned.  Co-workers quickly looked up information about her special need.  We were ON IT like white on rice.  Shortly after I switched into high gear, someone reminded me that a person who sometimes shopped at the store where I worked had a child with a heart condition.  It was too bad we couldn't talk to her right now, because she might know more about it or where to start.
Five minuets later she walked in the door.  FIVE MINUTES. I have no idea what my face looked like when she came in, but at that moment I knew God was in this.  I just knew.
I did my best to explain my situation to this sweet lady, and she quicly called her pediatric cardiologist's office and told them I would be calling and to help in whatever way they could.  I called, was immedately put through to the doctor's nurse who explained Charlotte's heart condition to me.  I requested a consult with the cardiologist, they called him (ON VACATION) to set it up.  Meanwhile, Sam was calling the International Adoption Clinic in Birmingham to set up a file review and consult, via phone.
I called our family coordinator back and told her about my research (I felt pretty comfortable with her condition) and the appointments we set up.  She was pleased with what we had done and told me that the only other thing we needed to do before we could see the file was to contact our social worker and have her "ok" it.  I wasn't very optimistic about our social worker's approval.  In fact, I was afraid she'd say no.      

Continued in Part Two